I have two things on my mind, one - GAME FIVE OF THE STANLEY CUP PLAYOFFS and two, I don't wannnnnnaaaa go to work today.
I was so comfortable in my bed dreaming my weird dreams, why oh why alarm clock must you speak to me of realities I am trying to deny?
And so here I am awake with my cup of coffee, stealing away precious moments of my own before they become the time clock's. Am I the only one that thing work should be banned? I mean really....Work? Life is supposed to be about playing. Wait, maybe I am still asleep...
Sigh. It's not that I don't love my job, I do, I mean for the love of God I have been there fourteen years - it's just that I hate the concept of being responsible.
I don't really, but I kinda do.
That is why I need to write a best selling novel and write from home and never ever have to depart from the freedom of a day that is calling me to play....
Beyond writing a book, I would love to have a column - much like what I do here but have enough people reading it that I may actually get paid to rant and muse about this phenom I call life.
I just have so much to say about everything...I wonder why I am made this way? A deep thinker, an expressive communicator? I wonder about it a lot - what is my purpose for having this extremely wide open mind and mouth?
I know that when I sit down to write is usually to ease the burden of an overflowing mind - sometimes if I don't get out what is in my head I feel doomed to erupt - like yesterday and my Mommy dearest rant - write or sit at the kitchen table in silence and bawl my eyes out for lack of anything else to do to ease the stress. I choose writing - I hope you all find my evil rants funny and don't think less of me for saying aloud what a lot of Mother's think silently...And of course I would never let my kids dehydrate although it would serve as a powerful lesson, but no - Gatorade I will pack, a good Mommy less wire coat hangers I will be...
Writing for me is like therapy. When I put my thoughts down on the screen before me and I read them back to myself, I always have a sense of clarity as an end result. I start not having the foggiest idea what I will say and always end, with some sort of moral to my story. Sometimes, hell most times I don't know what the moral is myself until I read about it.
Kinda makes me laugh the way the words just tumble out of me uncontrollably and I literally have little idea of any kind of direction or purpose.
So cool to be a "writer". I guess that's what I am now, a writer who cheats on her dream by having a retail position that kinda sorta pays the bills.
The answer is my book and of this I am sure - just not exactly sure how I can get through that process as my moods come and go with the wind. How will I ever start and finish an entire book? Oh my, it is daunting to even consider....
I am also a poet - I have considered writing a massive amount of poetry to submit to a publisher - I think my poets voice is a strong one - I just write my poetry for me, I am a little wary about releasing them to the world. You guys would know all my secrets then....I would be super duper exposed.
But wouldn't it be nice to do what you love, what you really love - your true passion and have financial success? Ahhhh if only.
I remember that Oprah Winfrey once said, find your true passion and that is the key.
This here, words and words and more words - this is my love of all loves. This is where I feel most alive, most free and most safe.
Now to make the dolla bills yo.
I literally have no idea what I just said FYI -
It is a startlingly beautiful morning and I hear the clock ticking furiously in my head reminding me that I have to get ready for WORK, my not real passion - ugh.
I want to sit here all day instead of deal with women who think they are fat and ugly. Not sure I can muster up the therapist today - not sure the fashion Diva will rise to assuredly outfit these ill of confidence women. I wanna watch the birds in my front yard poke their beaks in and out of the ground searching for their worms instead. That and lay on the pool deck and think....
I guess the plus side of my work day is that I am out at seven o'clock which means I will be home and sitting on my ass with my feet up at opening face off time - I will get to see GAME 5, thank you Jesus. (or Allah, Buddha etc. etc)
These last two games have been some of the most intense hockey I have ever been privy to witness in my long hockey loving life. Man those Canucks are playing dirty tho - Shit there has been a lot of nastiness directed at our team - biting, bad hits, fights. I think it speaks volumes to how threatened they feel. I want the Bruins to get the cup so badly that it hurts my gut whenever I think about it. I want this more than I wanted the World Series for the Sox, more than any super bowl win - I want the cup in my hometown. I want to see it happen in my lifetime for the love of God. And don't I just wish that I were home for this? Don't I wish I were among my people in the midst of the all that New England pride? Yes, yes I do - Something about watching the Garden from Virginia feels weird and wrong. You can take the girl outta Boston, but NEVER get the Boston outta that girl. That's me, a loud and proud Bostonian.
Please, please let the fire from Horton's injury stay ignited under those boys asses, keep that fury in Vancouver and bring it home for the win In Boston - I think Bobby Orr should go to every game and begin it by waving the Horton flag - I think that is all the motivation the B's need to kick ass, take names and make goals.
Wouldn't it just be something for them to get the Stanley Cup? Yes, yes it would....I am praying with all my hockey lovin heart that this is a fairy tale ending for them and for all of us who love them so.
And so, the clock beckons from the other room - I must go although the blinking cursor prompts me to write more. Til Seven I am property of the boutique - then after, I am a hometown fan hoping she gets to blog tomorrow about a game 5 win tonight.
I hope that you all have a blessed work day - UGH... And for those of you who are working your passion from home - I am green with envy.
LET'S GO BRUINS LET'S GO!!!!!
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