Sickened, period.

Good Morning,
I have about five minutes to write as my endocrinology appointment has finally arrived and is this morning in just a bit.
Really, blogging is about the last thing I should be doing, but.....You know me, so much to say, so much to say, so much to say.....
Yesterday I couldn't find the words to say anymore than I did. Yesterday the violence of the world had pervaded my head and hurt it so bad all I could do was breathe through it, forget about articulate.
I won't get into details, because I cannot - I will just say I witnessed something I never thought I would, EVER and it was a little too close to home for me. A little too close to my own and the randomness of it, the sheer carelessness and disregard had me reeling emotionally and raging on the inside - to put it ever so lightly.
There is a lot of violence in the world and I don't do well with it. Especially, most specifically when it has to do with a total disregard for the value of life.
Violent acts repel me.
I am the pansy that changes the channel on the TV when I see violence, can't do the stab wound scenes or the sound of flesh to flesh combat.
Really, I am far too sensitive for all that, literally turns my stomach.
And that is just on TV - when I am privy to real life violence - I become emotionally challenged and internally unhinged.
That was where I was yesterday, in limbo of the big question that plagues me - REALLY?????
Like REALLY????? and the WHY of it all?
I have no answers and certainly no power to change it - oh wait who am I kidding - I have answers, it's violence in the main stream, shitty ass parenting, selfishness and accessibility to handguns.
The NRA will love me now.
And I have no time for that debate, or to elaborate on my opinions this morning - unfortunately.
I will just say this.
We are all someone. I am someones daughter, sister, aunt, friend and MOTHER (among other titles)
what is it that a person who commits a violent act cannot conceptualize that we are all valuable, life is valuable and the right to extinguish that, is only God's?
I wasn't threatened or hurt per say, but by way of association - I was.
And would have been, if what I witnessed had been a successful attempt.
I have no fucking patience for violent people. No patience for it at all - pushes a button in me that makes me want to fight the oppressor but hide in my closet all at the same time.
Frustrating as hell and sad....
So Sad.
I hate to see it, hear it, read about it - it's everywhere.
And so I have to stop and go get in the shower and fill out a health history form that I have been dreadfully avoiding.
I guess I will end with this...
Life is valuable, there is no reason good enough to snuff it out in a careless act of impulsive violence. Get some self control already.
Have a blessed and SAFE day.